When?

I know I'm book smart, even a bit street smart. Apparently not so much "heart" smart. It's hard for me to understand how I can have such a big heart, be funny, be cute (yes I do think so), & ye maybe not the best physical appearance; yet still not have anyone special in my life. I see how girls cheat on their man and use them for their money or just manipulate them. My own friends, unfortunately. I'm here waiting to be found, I can't seem to fimd him so hopefully he finds me soon.

Every night I lay in my bed in my apartment...alone. dreaming, hoping, wishing to meet someone who will cuddle and hold my hand at night. Always wondering if it will ever happen to me. I want to give my all to that guy that puts a smile on my face. Maybe ive already met him or maybe not but I just want to know when will he be in arms at night ?

I want to be happy. I want hugs, kisses, embraces, LOVE!

4/20

Brownies
Amsterdam
Ganja
Mary Jane
These are probably the first things you thought of when you saw 4/20.
But for me it has a different meaning.

It reminds me that 10 days earlier was my moms bday. And now it's that someone special's bday.

He means so much to me and doesn't even realize it.

I hear his voice and it makes me smile. I drive to his place and everytime... I get butterflies in my stomach.

He hasn't realized how much he means to me. But at any given time I am prepared to let him go his way.

Never been one to have to fight for someone's love and affection.

I've always said it. My feet are firmly set on earth. I know I may or may not meet the guy of my dreams. I just hope to meet that guy that will make me laugh and cry of happiness. Just wants to hold me and cuddle.